A Superhero for Madeleine Joy

Madeleine JoyI suppose I always knew that you were his baby. The prayers whispered by his bedside.  The little “I love you’s” muttered up against my belly.  The excitement every time he would hear the Doppler sing a rhythmic “thump-a-thump-a-thump”.

Yes, it seems you were his from the beginning.

But I still worried…

(You will find I do that often.)

I worried that he just might balk at the thought of more things pink and princess.  I worried about his “needing a little brother” heart.  And I worried that he wouldn’t be able to give up his dreams of a superhero buddy with whom he would dig up dirt and climb the walls and eat everything in the pantry before Mom had even made breakfast.

But I should have known better.

I should have known that as we sat him down on the couch and handed him your most recent picture, I didn’t need to take a deep and nearly-held breath as I said, “Can you read that for us, buddy?”

I should have known that he would quietly nod and take his “emerging reader” time with each word…

“It’s. A. Girl.”

Just as I should have known he would grow very quiet until finally, he would look up at me and say, “If she is going to be tiny, she needs a good superhero to look out for her.”

I should have known because even as the words fell from his mouth and mama tears came, my mind was flooded with snippets of conversation with him over the last month…

How you might come before September...

How you might be tiny…

How you might stay a little longer in the hospital…

Just a few little “emotional preparedness” suitcases that had been handed to him in love, but had also forged in Drew an urgent need to protect you.

His baby.  His sister.  His Madeleine Joy.

I suppose I could tell you more…

About how he came down shortly after the reveal, placed his hand on my shoulder and said with the maturity of a 40-year-old man, “I am SO excited to have a baby sister.  I already love Maddie so much...”

Or about how he carefully picked out your baby blanket which had to have pink AND blue but also needed to pass the “how does it feel up against your cheek” test…

Or about how he saw a batgirl bib with cape and matching booties and decreed you must have it, even standing up to the loud protest of the sisters who wanted a pink supergirl set instead…

I could tell you so many things in so many ways about how your big brother already adores you.

batgirlBut nothing, absolutely nothing, can top the moment he discovered you were coming. Nothing can match how in a quiet and steady love, he told the world what he already knew…

That a girl as amazing as you are would not only need a good superhero but would also be one too.